Friday, August 8, 2014

Hello Lovelies,

So I'm counting down the days until this job is done. I agree Miranda and Kitty, good riddance lol.

So to add to my frustration from yesterday, I called my parents for advice on what action I should take on a situation that came up later yesterday. I won't get into details but, yes it involved redundancies that looked bad. ANYWAYS. I was talking with my parents and all of a sudden I just broke down. The stress just got to be too much and that I'm not letting go. And with all the anxiety of finding a job before the end of the month it pushed me over the edge. I ended up crying on the phone for 30 mins with them. It felt good to get it out, but I just have this looming sense of doom over me now. It's really becoming real. It's not something that's a while off, I have 3 weeks left. That's extremely tangible. I can't hide from it. I can't pretend everything's alright. I have to start getting my stuff together as much as I just want to crawl in a hole and forget about life.

This day can't end soon enough. I just need to go home and cuddle on the couch with D and the cat.


Only 2 hours left until I can call it a day.

So I just removed my work e-mail off my phone. I think that's one way to let go. Now work can't follow me home if I don't want it to :) Next step: stop answering text messages right away (unless I'm at work).

So, so far today I've eaten a couple carrots, pieces of celery, 2 cauliflower florets and 2 cherry tomatoes with a bit of ranch dip for about 80 cals along with a chicken and dried mango Protini (packaged sliced chicken with some dried mango) for 90 cals. I'm currently having a cup of greek yogurt for 100 cals. The test for the rest of day will be dinner and late night. My downfall lately is that when 9pm comes around I'm so hungry I just eat everything within reach. Not good. So I'm currently at 270 plus a coffee with some cream for a total of lets say 300 cals to keep it even. We'll see what happens when I get home...

Well I think I'm just going to ramble if I keep on writing, so I'll just end it off here.

I hope you all have a great weekend!!

Thursday, August 7, 2014

OK so I KINDA fell off the wagon...

Hello Lovelies,

I know, I know. I haven't posted in almost 2 weeks.


My week got pretty hectic after I stopped writing and I was heading into vacation. So I figured I would disconnect from the computer and get out of my own head for a bit. I needed a bit of R&R.

So let do some catch up. I'll get the nasty stuff over first.

I'm massive. There's no doubt about that. I'm sitting at 146 steadily without any loss. Now, Aunt Flo is coming this weekend so I'm expecting that spike on the scale that normally comes at this time. But I need to get my ass in gear. And the first thing is to get my diet in check. I'm not even going to write what I've been eating but all my decisions have come out of laziness and it's as simple as that. It's just my own damned fault.

My contract at work is quickly coming to an end so the job hunt is more feverish than it has ever been. I do have my first interview next week though. It's for a government program that sends student groups on exchanges within Canada to learn about Canadian culture and heritage. I'd be doing PR, new media, event planning and other various marketing and communications work. It's kind of my dream job. It might not be in the industry that I'd prefer but the job itself is what I've been looking for!

As much as I hope to find a new job, I'll just be happy when I'm done with this job. I'm tired of only getting half of the information I need to do my job and then people get annoyed when I ask for the rest of the information. For example: I'm supposed to send out an acceptance letter, invoice and registration links for a new student. However, I have really only heard of this person in the last couple of days, I don't have any information and the family hasn't filled out any of the application forms needed. They are not in the database, and therefore, I can't send out the registration links because I have no information to send! But when I ask for them to contact the family, I'm told to drop them a line. I ask for contact information and I get a street address... Ummmm... HOW  am I supposed to contact them? And on top of that I have had no part in this process so it would be better for the parties involved to do so. I don't mind sending out the information but they need to disclose the information I need to do this job properly. These are the roadblocks I encounter EVERY SINGLE DAY here. UGH!

Anyways, 3 weeks left of this place and I'm done for ever. I debating removing my work e-mail off my phone so I don't get bothered with it. I'm also thinking of blocking my bosses numbers so that once I leave they can't contact me. And if they need me to do something for them, I'm also considering charging them if I haven't found a new job in the meantime. I don't owe them anything. No  charity from me.

Anyways, my day is almost done so I'm going to pack up and get ready for D to pick me up.